Veni. Vidi. Vici.

Check it:
>Out at bar with bros, arrive considerably late because we were barhopping
>Already pretty smashed from previously ingested drinks
>Try to dance with a 6.34/10 but she's a fucking stuck up cunt
>Walk to the bar, ask for 7&7, Blonde landmass eyeing me something fierce
>MY DICK IS GETTING WET
>Best bro notices me walking in her direction and tries to stop the massacre before it begins
>Tell him it's too late, I've already committed to the sacrafice
>Engage Diabeetus Betty with my witty banter
>Tell this bish I wanted to squirtle on them jiggly puffs
>The oils in her deep fryer begin to churn, it's off to her place
>Talks to me about niggers constantly hitting on her on the ride there (Why am I not surprised?)
>Her apartment is literally just a fridge and a mattress on a box spring, wreaks of weed
>She strips down to bra and panties
>Gelatinous waterfalls of fat EVERYWHERE
>Body has no shape to it whatsoever
>She puts on the condom
>IT'S GO TIME
>Fuck her missionary and become hypnotized by melodic waves of fat rippling between her cunt and chin
>Get completely disgusted and tell her to flip over for doggie
>OMG WHAT HAVE I DONE
>Her ass is literally none existent
>Somehow, her fat has managed to avoid her tits and ass completely and conglomerated into one giant gunt, her gut and her cunt successfully became one entity.
>Midway through fucking her doggie I lose my erection
>She starts gobbling my giblets like a turkey dinner
>Boner revived
>Fuck her doggie one last time until I'm completely disgusted
>In fear of losing my hard on again and having the night be a complete waste, I tell her to lie on her back so I can come on her tits (Which were more like loose sacks of skin)
>After about 5 sets of 30 reps on my dick, I finally bust one
>Wipe my dick on her mattress and tell her I gotta get back to my friends
>Leave her apartment and call one of my bros to get me